Is More Creepy, Less Creepy?

By nature, all vans yearn to be creepy vans.  This is because to a van- creepiness is synonymous with sexiness.  Creepiness gets you noticed; it gives you the option of being revved by only the creepiest of humans; and if you are creepy enough, people will write about your assets on creepy van websites.

But like sexiness, if taken to the extreme, creepiness will appear to be unnatural, sleazy, and obvious. Such is the case with this creepy van that I encountered at the Wal-Mart. As I have highlighted below, all of the creepy components were there: a sexy lady license plate holder, curtains made from sensual cotton sheets, a long ladder, and in true creepy van fashion; it was cruising with a creepy conversion comrade.        

   

It is likely that you are thinking what I was thinking when I first examined this van.  That this van is a poser.  Maybe this rationale is correct.  However, when you stop to think about the situation, you cannot deny the fact that this van really creeps you out. 

Where There Is One Creepy Van...

Creepy vans, much like scorpions, like to travel in pairs.

I became aware of this fact today while cruising by my local Home Depot's parking lot.  As you can clearly see, both of the vans in this picture are textbook examples of creepy vans.

However, what is missing from this picture are the tons more really creepy, mildly creepy, and borderline creepy vans that were lurking all over the place.  Have creepy van owners caught on to the fact that people are avoiding their natural creepy habitats so now they are gathering in locations that were once deemed creepy van free?